Expert fantasy football analysis. Minus the expert.
Category
Week 2
-
09.21.09Monday Morning JerkA LenDale White owner comments on the Chris Johnson performance Once again, there’s been an epic achievement in the football world, and once again I find myself dwelling on the negative, unable to escape the fly in the ointment, floating inconspicuously but unmistakably. Now, unlike last week when I foolishly claimed that Adrian Peterson’s performance was very close to being sub-par, I offer no criticism of Chris Johnson. He was fantastic, no qualifiers necessary. But, get this: I really think the Titans should’ve called more plays for LenDale White. How can you say such a thing, you ask. How can you deign to ...
-
09.18.09You Know Who You Should Sit?Is that Hester? You know what? Fuck it. I’m throwing it downfield. Sure, I can see Forte open in the flat. Who gives a shit? I’m not some bitch ass that checks down when I can let it rip. I’m the big time gunslinger who can slide that ball ride in there. And if it doesn’t work this time, I’ll do it again next time because going deep gives the girls TP. Continue Reading...
-
09.18.09You Know Who You Should Start?Michael Bush (RB – OAK) While there are many reasons why Bush might make a solid flex play this week, here’s one that you might not be aware of: Years ago, as Michael Bush’s beloved Nana Bush lay on her deathbed, Michael went to visit her. “Mike-ella,” she whispered, the strength completely gone from her voice. “I want you to promise me one thing before I leave this mortal coil.” “Anything Nana, anything,” he responded. “I want you to promise that you’ll have scored 5 professional touchdowns by Yom Kippur of the year 5770.” “What the fuck is Yom Kippur?” Continue Reading...
-
09.18.09The Marble Ryan Lock of the WeekThanks a million, Adrian Peterson. With a performance nothing short of iconic, the man they call AD pounded the will out of the Cleveland Browns defenders until they reached a level of pliancy where he could simply toss them around like rag dolls, and then proceeded to tear off crushing 60-yard TD runs as easily as he walks his grandma to church. More importantly, the performance delivered the easy cover for the Vikes, as even Brett Favre couldn’t give back enough points for the Browns to close in on that 4 point spread. So we’re 1-0 to start the season, ...
-
09.17.09The Week 2 Podcast: “I beat the game”Marble Ryan triumphantly returns to the podcast to discuss his new self-appointed nickname, review The Ochocinco Show on USTREAM, and offer a few Week 2 predictions. Subscribe to the podcast on iTunes, or download it directly to your computer.
-
09.15.09Not So Fast, My FriendWeek 1 is in the books and you’re already rushing to judgment. You saw the way someone else’s star RB rushed for two touchdowns on Sunday, and you’re busy proposing multiple trade offers. So before you lock down your new love and change your Facebook status to “in a relationship” by this time tomorrow, I’m issuing you a “not so fast, my friend” warning, Lee Corso-style. It’s only one week and there are 16 more to go! You don’t want to trade away one of your draft picks just to end up with a two-face who looks good in the ...
